This here’s Stretch Coyote talkin’ at ya.

Seems like a lot of this planet’s inhabitants wanna kill each other, or at least round up their so-called enemies and re-educate ‘em. You’d think with all the awful headlines nowadays about beheadings and such that we’d all be lookin’ for a little contrast to the rough and tumble nature of human conflict.

But once again, the top money-makin’ movie this weekend was about how if you’re really good at killin’ people and surviving explosions folks will line up around the block to buy tickets, just to watch the splendor of it all. I suppose if you’re stuck workin’ in a cubicle all week long you might yearn for an explosion or two, just to shake things up.

A coupla days ago I had to go to my local cable TV office to get a new remote control cause I’d worn out some of the buttons, especially the one where you back things up cause gal darn it I can’t understand what that guy was whispering to that girl when they were hiding in a dumpster from the Russian assassination squad. Then there’s them downtown abbey folks who say stuff like:

“I’ve kept back a few in bud. I’ll be home for the dressing gong.”

Yep, I had to rewind that one a few times, what with them peculiar British accents and all.

Anyway, I was standin’ in this long, long line at the local cable TV office where I caught sight of one of the clerks sittin’ in the back eatin’ a sandwich even though it was well past the lunch hour and the natives were restless. And this big TV screen on the wall was playin’ some movie with these guys flyin’ around in-between machine gun bullets while all sorts of stuff was explodin’ and burstin’ into flames. Kinda made it hard to be patient.

On the way home, tryin' my best to avoid random road rage, I stopped to get gas and this itty bitty screen on the pump started playin’ a commercial for some TV show about guys in animal skins who are especially good at slicing off body parts of their enemies.

I do believe it’s gettin’ harder and harder to find a peaceful place in this world.

Now I do understand that the news is not just about what’s new. It tends to get all worked up about what’s goin’ wrong. And some of them cable TV news shows will sit on one of them god-awful stories all day long, askin’ just about everybody but the family dog to come up with an opinion about what it all means.

At least in my imagination I’d like to live in a nice, peaceful place where everybody is pleasant and there are more kinds of desserts than you could shake a stick at. The older I get, the more I’d like to climb inside one of those nice little books with pretty pictures my grandma used to read to me when I was a young'un. I wish there was a way I could go back in time and see my grandmother again and spend some quality time with her two dozen cats. Both grandma and her cats were especially reassuring when I was young and tender.

In fact, I’m just about ready to give up the entire adult experience, makin’ a few exceptions for romance and whiskey.

~ Stretch Illustration by John Sherffius
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